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Brut Quotes

Brut Quotes

Friday, May 15, 2015

Giving Brut a Chance

I've never felt so lost and relieved at the same time.  It is an odd combination.

I have not had the words to write much and that too is strange for me.

If you've noticed, hubby, Mark has been doing all the updates on Brut.

It is definetly like being caught between a rock and a hard spot.

Brut was down this past Tuesday (5-12-15) with low blood pressure and probably bleeding internally.  For the first time since all this started with his eye, he looked to be in some pain.  It was a scary night as I cried and told him everything he means to me and how much I love him.  Not knowing if this was the time he was going to bleed out for good.  I did everything to make him comfortable.  He was still eating and drinking, which was a good sign.  I stayed up all night with him.  (I couldn't sleep anyways)  And I prayed this couldn't be it.  Not yet.  He still has so much life in him God.  Please not today.

And Wednesday morning, he bounced back like nothing had happened.  Just like that.  He was my Brut again.  Maybe not 100%, but very close.  He been great Thursday and Friday as well.  Maybe a little slower at times, but still looking good.

And I'm so relieved.  And I've cried tears of joy that he's still with us and I've cried tears of sadness that this is going to happen again and again.  This roller coaster ride.

We don't know if he's a canidate for surgery.  It looks to be a good size risk.  We still have to make

more inquiries and ask more questions.  Like there would probably have to be a blood transfusion (because of internal bleeding) and not all vet clinics are equipped to do that.  And we still have to deal with his high blood pressure issues.

And every movement Brut makes is critical not to start bleeding internally again.  Plus counter acting his excitement level and hypertension.  His aggression has popped back up slightly and we have to keep that at bay.

And with our van being totalled, it makes it hard to transport him in our single cab beat up truck, except maybe to our local vet whose a couple blocks away.

And when you start adding up the odds agaisnt us, it seems hopeless.  So utterly hopeless.

That is until I saw the comments left by readers and strangers wishing us well and Brut healing.

Prayers, good thoughts, POTP, and hugs. So many hugs.  It brought my spirit back up.  And gave me hope.

I didn't know if I had any left.  Until I saw your comments and donations.

Maybe just maybe the surgery could be done and we'd have our Brut back.

Mr. Orinery himself.  

Maybe there is a chance.

Thank you for giving me that chance again.

I can't thank everyone enough.

God bless you.

To learn more about Brut's diagnosis, you can read the ER trip to explain.

9 comments:

Brian106sc said...

We sure hope that handsome Brut stays on the feeling good side.

Pamela | Something Wagging said...

It must be so hard to keep your spirits up on this roller coaster ride. But I'm glad to hear you're feeling just a little bit of hope. I know you won't miss a moment of Brut feeling good and will be right by his side if he's feeling bad.


He's very lucky to have you both.

24 Paws of Love said...

Thanks Brian, we hope so too!

peacefuleve said...

Oh I'm so sorry to hear :( This is a hemangiosarcoma--mass on the spleen? Has anyone recommended Yunnan Bai Yao? It is a Chinese medicine formula that my vet told me about when Lamar was diagnosed with a mass on the spleen. I got some immediately and it really helped him rally. From what I have read and what I saw with him it is an excellent ally if your goal is to make your baby comfortable and prolong his good days. Lamar's mass was too big, and he was too old, for surgery to be an option for us but this helped him have some more good days. Big big big hugs and much love to you and to him!

24 Paws of Love said...

Yes, it is a mass on spleen. I've never heard of Yunnan Bai Yao nor has any of our vets suggested it. (It's all modern medicine where we live), but I know of a place that might have some. I will check into it. So sorry to hear that Lamar. Thank you so much for sharing this. I really appreciate it.

Pip said...

There's always hope even if it's just a glimmer of hope. Hope is hope and it's always there. I do know that roller coaster ride feeling of good days and bad days. We went through that with Pip. Brut doesn't sound like he is giving up and so you won't either. Hang in there. We will donate as soon as we can - need to wait until next pay period.

Lavi Damian-Boja said...

Stay strong Brut and family! We hope there will be a happy ending to all of Brut's problems.

peacefuleve said...

I got it in a shop in DC's Chinatown but you can get it online easily and cheaply. Most of the pills are for daily use; the small red pills are for acute episodes of bleeding out. Here is more info http://www.modernherbshop.com/Yunnan_Baiyao_Yunnan_PaiYao_s/147.htm. Hope it helps--hugs!

Rebekah Ward said...

(((Hugs)))