Change of Heart

I just burst into tears.  I was watching a nature show about arctic animals and their survival skills in the brutal conditions, when on came a huge flock of arctic ducks.  Thousands and thousands of them.  That's when I broke down.  I'd been doing that a lot lately, grieving about Luigi.

 For those who don't know, Luigi was our White Peking Duck, that we kept as a pet for over 13 years.  He died three years ago, gorging on sunflower seeds, that I didn't know until it was too late that the seeds were deadly for ducks.  It was an awful day when Luigi died.  Three days after Christmas.  He was weak and the only thing that was keeping him alive was we were having a very mild winter.  I was trying to hand feed and water him but he would barely do either.  Then when the night finally dipped below freezing, he was gone.

I had been trying to come to terms with Luigi's death, when six months later Brut died.  Then a year and a half later Silver died.  I blamed myself for Luigi eating the littered birdseed from the bird feeder and that if I'd acted sooner or knew better I could have saved him.  I have had no desires to get another duck.  I couldn't go through that again.

That is up until a couple of months ago...I felt Luigi's spirit and the main point of our conversation was to help me forgive myself.  And after I got Luigi's forgiveness, I was able to forgive myself.

I want ducks again. 

Which is a huge step.  I didn't think I'd ever say that again.  Luigi was my first duck and was so very special to me, I didn't know if I could love another duck.

I don't know if it will be this year or next or the next, but I do know a couple of baby duckies are in our future.

Thanks to Luigi.

Tell me we are not all connected

I knelt down slowly next to the hole in our little part of theEarth.  I was stunned by the depth and shocked at the thought of laying his body in it.  We laid some straw on the bottom and began to lower our little ducky into the grave, it was then that the howls came from the house.  All the dogs singing together for the burial of our little ducky, Luigi.  They had lost a member of the family too.


In rememberance of our ducky, Luigi, who died a last month.

Luigi Arpil 2001-December 28, 2014

We end our year on a sad note as our beloved ducky, Luigi, died this past weekend.  

He will be forever missed.

We will have a speical memorial next post.

Wordless Wednesday-My Clover Oasis

Black/White Sunday-Flashback of a Snow Beauty

Counting our Blessings...

10 puppies...

4 Back Dogs

2 Front Dogs

2 kitty kitties

and 1 duck, who will never make it for dinner!!

Plus all of our animal loving blogging friends.

Happy Thanksgiving

From the 24 Paws of Love  :)

Monday Memories-Just Ducky

Monday Memories-our little trip down memory lane.

Today stars are Luigi and Mojo.  Eleven years ago, we picked up our first two baby ducks at the local feed store when they were about 7 weeks old.  They were little pooping machines made of fluffy feathers and they grew like weeds.  You could literally see them change day by day.  One of these days I'll have my husband explain how he convinced me that we needed duckies in our entourage of pets. :)

Here is Luigi and Mojo two days after bringing them home.

We weren't around very much during this time period and they bonded tight with each other instead of us.

This is about 8 weeks old making a mess in the bathtub.

At about 9 weeks they hit that ugly duckling stage as there feathers started to come in.

You can see this especially on their tails.

Still best friends at almost 10 weeks.

Here they are just over a year old.  Luigi on the left, Mojo on the right.  It would be a year later that we found Mojo killed by a predator and Luigi walking in circles around her.  

If you have never seen ducks while they are courting, thank your lucky stars.  They are quite violent in their ritual, so much I felt like I was watching a domestic abuse case.

So while I was sad for Mojo's demise, there was a sense of relief as well.

Still it was difficult seeing one duck and Luigi seemed pretty lost for a while, but once he realized he was still king of the roost, he eventually came around.

Now he's the magistrate between the two packs of dogs and lives the life of King Duck.

Not bad for a little baby ducky.

The POOL is now OPEN!!

And Luigi is inviting all of his ducky and doggie friends for his first ever POOL PARTY!

There will be all kind of games and fun things to do 

such as...

(click on video or on YouTube)

Come on over!

The water's GREAT!!

The Secrets of Luigi

Boy, I bet those dogs would be surprised to find out the real reason she bothers to go outside every day in the freezing wind and snow is to take care of me!  Shhhh...let them think it's their silly tactics are working!!

Monday Memories-Lucky Ducky

 Lucky Ducky

(sorry about poor quality.  It was difficult to get a good picture.)

Last spring I had the chance to incubate a duck egg.  It was one of the most fascinating experiences of my life.  There is a process called "candling" where you can see inside the egg to gauge it's development.  By taking a box with a light on the inside and placing the egg over a small hole cut at the top of the box, in a dark room you are able to see the growth of the cells inside the shell wall.

What started out as a small heart and veins running through the entire inside, developed into a "jumping embryo" until it had filled half of the egg and was difficult to detect movement.  For some reason it really surprise me when the embryo started moving and you could feel life through the shell.   It was something right out of cell biology and was the most bizarre and beautiful thing I had ever witnessed about the beginning of life.

Due to the nature of incubating my time was completely invested in this little egg.  I had to turn the egg three times a day at regular scheduled intervals.  Due to the poor quality of the incubator I had to constantly regulate the temperature as it didn't have a thermostat and there were some scary moments when the temperature spiked or dropped.  Even when the temperature was fairly stable it still fluctuated and I had to continually check and make adjustments throughout the day and night.  I also had to maintain the humidity inside the incubator.  I was on constant alert with this little guy and did plenty of worrying and fretting like any new mother-to-be who had the responsibility of this tiny life in their hands.  

Sadly my baby duck died before he could hatch.  I took his death pretty hard as I had watched this incredible life form before my eyes.  I had already had a name picked out:  Lucky Ducky.  It wasn't original but it fit him.
It was such a blessing to witness this miracle of life and was heartbreaking that it ended as quickly, but I have never forgotten Lucky.  He now quacks freely with two of our other ducks that passed on before him.  There was something about actually witnessing the beginning of life that changed the way I view life and impacted me very deeply.  Who would have thought that an egg could bring about such love?  Watching Lucky grow was an awesome example of the miracle of life and the love that surrounds us.

Here is a youtube video of a 9 day old chick that shows the "jumping embryo":  9 day old chick embryo
Here is another one that shows at day 15:  Candling Duck Egg Day 15