Silver- Missing my girl

Silver:  A year and a half gone exactly today.

Missing her velvety coat

Her intensity

Her white muzzle against the snow

Her solid blackness with any background

The way she always slept

I miss everything about Silver.

And then some...

Silver's heart will shine on

Today marks Silver's one year anniversary since her passing.  The week has been hard leading up to today, but today I feel released and at peace.  I think about her every day and see so many of her qualities in her kids that shine through even more since they lost their mother, Silver.  In return, I see more of Silver every day.  Things I couldn't see before as strongly as I can now.  Mostly her giant, gentle heart.  She was such a beautiful mother to her kids and to me.  Those nurturing qualities have been passed on to her kids, in different ways and forms.  Silver's heart will shine on.

A poem I wrote shortly after Silver died, that speaks true today:

In the depths of blackness
I have wondered if I could ever love again
Another dog
Not knowing how to love the ones
I have
It was like the love just
drained from me
into the dirt
and I didn't know if I
could feel again
How could this human
bear that pain again
It doesn't seem possible
As someone once said to me
Intensely we love
Intensely we grieve
And it feels like my heart
can not bear
anymore
Not one more ounce of the loss
until I wake from my death coma
to know Silver's love is still
there
in every ounce of blood
coursing with love
Four puppies who lost
their mother
and I am renewed
I am not alone

Another Level of Reality

In 6 days it will be Silver's six month anniversary since she passed away.  She had her first bloom on her roses today.  It has brought me much sadness in the beauty.

I miss my girl so much.  By the time of July 13th, her roses will be half in bloom.  They are Old English Roses called Winchester Cathedral.  A name that has special meaning to a Crosby, Stills and Nash song we love.  We planted them a month ago today.  Added rocks around her from our favorite place called Copper Harbor in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, a place we took Silver and our first dog Alex several times.    Then put up new fencing and post around Silver and Brut.  Surreal. Somber.  Peaceful and Beautiful.  Our new cycle of life for the Momma and Daddy Dogs of the 24 Paws of Love.

Someday I hope to find the love and joy in Silver's roses  like I have with Brut and the spirit that lives on in her.

Two Year Blogiversary

There once was a family of dogs

Who wanted to have a blog

So they  barked

and they begged

until their humans

wrote the 24 Paws of Love

I was telling my wife that we needed to start a dog blog and she just shook her head...

Yeah, but he's MY purple monkey! Back OFF!

Yes, that is how it all started.  Thank goodness for a persistant husband!!  And because things around the homestead have been in such an upheaval we missed our 2 Year Blogiversary on June 30!  And that's just crazy talk around this house.  :)  How could we miss out on thanking our readers for sharing in all of our tears, joys and frustrations?  How could we not thank you for having our own little place in the doggie blog world where we are not the misfits for loving our dogs?  Not to mention just being able to write all about our dogs and someone actually reads it...isn't that just crazy?!?

Try that again will ya MOM!!

To be able to thank all of you for the encouragement and support that you just can't get from a "normal" person and always being able to share your uplifting words in such time of need.  Can't forget those comments that start out as giggles then have us falling off our chairs while the tears roll down with laughter, just because you "get it."  Or standing together in our fears and anger when their is a dog injustice.

Big Bro you are no match for me!!

Our two packs have grown and thrived because you have all been a part of our lives.  It has taken each of your unique perspectives, experience and angles on life to continue to open our eyes from such an isolated viewpoint.  You are our dog friends and it is an honor to call you so.  Never have we meant so many crazy dog loving people who believe it's all for the dog.  So we take this moment, this special place in time when we first enter the blog world to tell you how much we appreciate our readers and being part of our lives.

Thank you from the bottom of our tummies!

pee.s.  Monday Memories will be back next Monday.