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Saturday, April 18, 2015

Peace with Luigi's death

Remember our little ducky Luigi who past this last winter?  Well, I was in Luigi's pen cleaning out his pool that was nasty from sitting all winter long.  In fact it still had ice in it!  After I emptied the pool and lifted it out of the dirt, I found quite a few feathers where the rim of the pool was.  I was so surprised and grateful to find them.  Since Luigi died in December he had already gone through his molting season in September, so to find any feathers was a gift.

I have some from over the years, but this was special because they would be the last ones.  And I found peace in them.  I'd been sort of dreading spring because that's when all the water fun happened for Luigi and I was afraid that it would be too difficult for me without him here.  But honestly I've found peace being in his pen and cleaning up.  I didn't expect it and it was a nice feeling.

I also found these little rubber duckies, one was in his pen and the Santa one was in the house.  Something about it touched me.  They were dog toys I bought several years ago and I don't know how the one got in the pen and I didn't see it before.  Such a sweet gift to find.

Something I didn't expect either was that as much as I missed my little buddy, I did not miss the responsibility of taking care of him through the winter.  In fact, it was the first winter that I didn't have to go outside when it was bitter cold.  I enjoyed staying in quite thoroughly for an entire day when it was too frigid to bear and the dogs could only go out for their business.  I hadn't realized how trying it was always having to trudge through the cold, snow and ice, with a bucket of water and food, until I didn't have to do it anymore.  And I never really thought about it at the time, it was just what I had to do to take care of Luigi, but I must say I enjoyed the break!  It was like a luxury that I'd earned.

OH! And not having to worry all winter long whether he was safe or not, warm enough, protected enough on those nights when it got -25 to 30F below zero.  That was heaven!  Just to know he was safe with God and in the best hands possible was such a blessing.

And so friends, we turn another chapter in our book.  I still hear Luigi squaking at me and I still will get a glimpse of him here and there.  Happy and free and probably learning to fly because he never could in this life!


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