Brut savior

I'd been angry on and off for a couple of days.  Irritable, depressed, and moody.  It wasn't one thing, it was a little bit of everything.  It seemed like every word that came out of my mouth would start a fight between hubby and me that I couldn't seem to control.

We were sitting out with the Back Dog, our time to relax and catch up when one word lead to another.  And BAM another fight arose.  In the midst of our words flying back and forth, Brut came to where I sat and stared at me with those deep caramel eyes with understanding and a plea.  He came close to let me pet him, never taking his eyes off of me, slowing soothing my ruffled fur.  He stayed there for a while, letting me stroke his thick mane as the reality of my actions sunk in.  Don't act like me, he seemed to whisper.  It hurts too much.

I finally backed down from the fight and hubby and I were able to talk.  I thanked Brut several times.

Later in the evening during my 'me time,' Brut and I looked long and deep in each others eyes with an understanding of knowing when to rescue each other.  I think he enjoyed being on the other end of the stick and being the savior this time. :)

Aren't dogs just the BEST?

 

Draft Week-How do you talk to your dogs?

This week I'm posting some of my "drafted" post.  This post, written last summer got lost somewhere down the line, but still holds true to this day.  

I am rather quiet, shy, introvert.  I don't like crowds or being at large gathers and most of the time I prefer to stay in as I dislike shopping and I am nervous in restaurants. I am not a good communicator, I prefer to write than talk.  I have lived most of my life in silence which brought me to an understating of dogs at a different level than most at a very young age.  When I am out with my dogs, I tend to stick to places where we are primarily alone.  This private time is sacred to me.  While I love witnessing and experiencing the packs in their entirety, there is something precious about communing in the solitude with a beloved dog and soaking in the calm that surrounds.  Most of my communication with my dogs is through body language where I find myself most in tune with them and I use hand gestures and eye contact to convey what feel.  I do talk to the dogs, but we rarely have long, vocal conversations.    

There are times I have found myself feeling a little guilty not talking to dogs more, but when my husband is home he makes up for the silence in the house and then some.  He is a pretty gabby guy and carries on with the dogs like they are long, lost friends after a long day at work.  When he takes one or two for a car ride he engages them in lengthy conversations, mingle with cute talk.  He sings to them all of the time, making up songs about them and every night he sings "Rock-A-Bye-Baby" to each and every one.  He can not talk to them enough.

So which are you the silent communicator or the jabber jaw when it comes to talking with your dog?      

What does "Woof" really mean??

I never realized a dog could be emotionally hurt by another dog and Zappa and Brut have had quite a run at doing that.  Back and forth, playing favorites, jealousy, respect and lack of it, each of them trying to take on and handle the lead and the thousands of mistakes have contributed to all of these feelings.  And I have realized by witnessing these two dogs how easy it is to hurt someone by not knowing them.  Not knowing what someone has been through and not being able to understand where they are coming from and how the canine human relationship can become so misconstrued.

Communicating to each other in foreign languages and body signals.  Each of us misinterpreting the other on so many different levels, yet somehow finding that line of common ground enough to co-habituate together.  I mean when you really think about it, it’s a wonder the dogs even stay with us.  We expect them to understand us, EVERY TIME, that it is so easy to forget that this is a two way street.  I think as humans it is so easy for us to vocalize our needs and that our dependence on words is so much like breathing that we forget there is a second party involved.  An entirely different species, in fact!  I mean really when you think about it so cut and dry like that, doesn’t it just blow your mind?  It has become common ground to have animals in our home and yards and cars it is almost like we have almost forgotten, that they really aren’t human!! 

I mean think about it…when your dog suddenly stands up and comes to you wagging their tail and barks happy barks…what in the world is he saying?  Thinking?  Nobody knows what the language of “Woof” really means?  Even if we play the guessing game with them and they respond to one word more than the other and we think, “that’s what that means,” does it mean it hold true for the next time?  Is it like potatoe and patatoe?  We still don’t know what the dog was saying, as an actual word or phrase.  It’s like trying to talk to aliens if you really think about it.  BOL!!  Because really we say the same word to mean the same thing and I would go as far to say I think dogs are much smarter than humans, they can learn much easier because we give them more reasons to do so.  Like tasty treats or fun toys or our attention.  How much do we really apply that to our dog?  I would think logically there would be some similarities, but as far as the actual approach…who knows.  Because we come up against the language barrier again and never really knowing what “Woof” means.   Does the way we say it, sound like the way they say it??

I mean think about if we all suddenly went mute, how would you communicate to your dog?  Would you be able to break everything into their language without using words and still convey what you needed and wanted to say?  What if you had to speak with your body using dog language, could you do it?  Do you think you could do it for an hour?  Half hour?  15 minutes?  Maybe that would be a good challenge.  It would be interesting, wouldn’t it? 

What do you think, can you do something with your dog without using any words and still find way to do it??

And if anyone thinks this might be an interesting topic for an official challenge, let me know in the comments and any other thoughts you might have.  :)

Can Your Relationship Stand?

Writing about my dogs is my passion, but lately I've been having some difficulties being able to express myself.  What if I came to point where I couldn't write anymore and had one last chance to write for a post for 24 Paws of Love?  If I had one last message of what I value most during this journey with my dogs, what would I say that would make the biggest impact for another dog lover who happened to stumble on that forever post?  What has been impressed upon me the most if I had one last word to say that I could share about my experience, strength and hope of my lives adventure of living with dogs?

Relationship.

Everything from the time I was born has been about the beautiful woven relationship I have had with all of the dogs I have been blessed with in my life.  Take away all the training, behavior modification and all the things a dog can do and the foundation is this incredible friendship is deep and rich with a love matched in heaven.

One of the most beautiful gifts I have been given over and over is this inter-connection between these loving creatures and the two way street that exist.  I have known and received the gifts of love that dogs give, but it was when I realized what they received from me that open channels of energy that were beyond my comprehension.  They needed me, not for food, water and shelter, but they needed me to be me.  A concept that is beyond measure and still sends shivers of love through my soul.  How can there be anything more beautiful?  Our exchanges of communication are so pure they have pierced my heart in places I never knew existed.  When I look into the eyes of the beast, I see they are staring back at me just as deeply and as intently as we become enveloped with each other.

What if everything you ever taught your dog was striped away, do you believe you would still have a relationship with your dog that would stand the test of time?  If your dog was never able to do anything right ever again, would you still have the friendship between the two of you as a solid foundation?  Is your relationship strong enough to withstand the raw and wild?  When all you have is each other is it enough to hold you together?  

In my humble experience, if you have a relationship, you have everything you need with your dog and what more could you ask for?  

What is Your Relationship to Your Dog?

Most of my post are fairly serious in nature, as you may have noticed.  BOL!  The reason:  childhood trauma survived by the love of a dog.  If it wasn't for my mom's dog and those that were to follow, I don't know how far I would have made it in life and I guess I take that kind of relationship pretty seriously.  Dogs have saved my life more than once. 

I believe everything with a dog and other animals is about relationship and the equality that exist between humans and animals.  Every day I find a deeper way to connect and bond, co-habituating with these beautiful creatures.  The unconditional love they give is unmatched and their forgiveness is astounding.  I never tire of it.  I could write books about the give and take that happens communicating with these being on a primal level as well as rising together on an emotional and intellectual level.  It can be mind-blowing and very humbling at the same time. 

I have been told I have a gift, being able to communicate with my dogs, but I don't believe it is any different from any other relationship I have.  I have just found that animals are more responsive to me than humans.  We seem to understand each other.  There are givens, like they don't judge or criticize, but it is deeper than that.  I found freedom and power when I gave up the notion that they are so different from us and are so difficult to understand and read.  I found that they think and feel more like us than not.  Do I understand everything?  No, nobody is meant to know it all, but I believe it is a growing and learning experience, just like any relationship.  Just as my ideas and beliefs have changed over the years, I believe dogs evolve along with us.

What a fascinating journey that we are able to experience and sharing in it together.

How has your dog changed the way you view him/her and your relationship together?  Have you found that your ideas or beliefs about dogs have changed as you have grown together?  Has your relationship with your dog ever made you question stereotypical beliefs that you or someone else may have had about your bond with your dog?

BE

I think my dogs take care of me more than I take care of them.  Sometimes it is more than the basics care or even the love that is put into it.  There is a constant of well being and protection in every part of the house.  I tend to go through some real rough patches and just the fact that the dogs are there can mean more than any affection they can give me.  It goes deeper than just understanding and knowing, it is the peace that evolves from this place.  To just be.  To be able to just accept and take in that they are there.

In the quiet of the night there have been many times I have taken the dogs out, thinking they want to play.  Instead we find ourselves listening to wind and the dogs barking in the night.  It is in these moments that by following the dogs direction I quiet my mind and listen.  That's when I discover it isn't always about doing, it is about being.  I may not be able to pick up on all the sights and sounds, but by stilling my mind, I get a taste of it.  Becoming in tune with the slightest movements they give signals their focus that leads me in the rhythm of their spirits.

More than often I am engrossed with the need 'to do' and what I am not 'doing' enough.  It is easy to get spread thin with 6 dogs divided.  Yet, every time I hear them howl together,  I find a unique oneness that brings them together and what surprises me more is that they always end together.  I always stop during these howling session to listen.  To listen to all six dogs singing together in their blended harmony.  No matter the strife any of them have with one another, it is the one place where they come together and blend into unison.  It is like magic.  It is a high like no other and often we join them.  For in those moments we are complete.  Putting everything aside to be in that moment.  I never tired of this beautiful demonstration of their love and the simple message to be.  A universal communication that we are all one, despite our differences.  How many times have you listened to a howling dog video and your dogs have joined in?

Have you taken the time to just be with your dog?

You can listen to the Howling Choir on our previous post:  The Sounds of the Hounds

Brut Trust

Look at this perfect pose!

FOCUS, MOM, FOCUS!!

Brut and I have this incredible bond.  Daddy says it is because we are so much alike! Our strongest bonding time is during our solitude walks.  We'd both been lacking in them because I wasn't feeling well last week and we were both getting rather grouchy about it.  :)

So today we took off for our favorite park.  Brut was full of pent up energy and frustration and I planned for that.  I threw on his harness and grabbed a piece of firewood for him to pull.  The wood weighed seven pounds.  It worked out perfect for him to pull.  It was enough to slow him down, but not so much that it is a strain.

You really can't expect TWO perfect poses!

 

We went around the park once without the wood then circled back so I could hook him to it.  He definitely needed the extra weight and I needed a steady pace!  We took the very back trails that are usually empty as the front trails had a visitor with their dog.  As soon as we were alone in the woods, we fell in sync with each other.  Literally and spiritually.  Brut's anxious eyes began to calm with mine.  There was an overall sense of content and connection, like we were the only two beings on Earth.  There was little said vocally, but our communication was immense. 

I have found through many walks by following Brut's body language to know what is going on around me.  This is key for knowing if there is something ahead.  It is also how we unify through the leash.  We were in harmony with each other and became one being with a fluid movement.  All of our anxieties melted into the forest ground.  We were in tune with each other.  This trust would be significant when we came to our fork in the road.

The Chosen Path

Brut and I are at our best when we are alone.  Remember I mention another visitor with their dog?  I know the trails inside and outside.  So does Brut.  We had a choice to make: take trail A which heads straight through the park and the front paths, with the possibility of running into the dog or take trail B that leads around the park thus avoiding the possibility.  So I asked Brut and he lead me down trail A.  A little ways down the trail, I was getting worried, I didn't want to run into the other dog.  I told Brut we needed to turn around.  He insisted continuing on.  I gave in to the trust and all knowing.  We have made these decisions before together.  There are times he needs to trust me and there are times when I need to trust him.  I chose to believe, so I followed him.

We hiked the rest of the trail and when we came to the end, we found the visitors were gone.  It was an incredible feeling.  To be able to let go and let him take the lead.  That's how in tune we were.  If he would have sensed something and his demeanor changed, I would have turned around, but we stayed in complete sync and balance with each other.  Our walk was like a cleansing of our souls while we listened to each other with our hearts.  Each synchronizing with other.  We were at peace as we aliened.  It is a spiritual high that will carry me for a long time.  It isn't the first, it won't be the last and that is the beauty of it.    

How do you relate to your pet?

My husband and I are very different in how we relate to our dogs.  I try to understand and communicate with our dogs with an animal instinct while my husband humanizes them.

When I was young I was very quiet and shy and learned how to communicate non verbally with our dogs.  I seem to be able to dig into their primal instincts and understand what they were trying to say.  I began to understand body language, long before I knew what it meant but learned how it was relevant to our relationship.  I do the same today.  I have taken it deeper by studying the eyes where I am able to connect at the deepest level.  We seem to know what the other is thinking.  When I talk to them, I talk to them as adults.  By studying their behaviors I have learned to communicate and think like them on a very personal level.     

Now my husband on the other hand never grew up with animals.  This is his first actual experience at having pets and sees things more from a child's point of view.  They are his friends, he carries on conversations with them, sings songs and always makes sure all of the dogs are given equal attention, treats and the like.  He sings lullabies to each one individually every night at bedtime .  If he were home during the day he would probably dress them up and have a tea party.  They are like his children and his best friends.  He is overly protective about their welfare and makes sure they stay within the fence.  He is heartbroken if any of them get hurt for any reason.  To him they are all still puppies.     

The dogs respond to both of us.  They relate to both of our types of connection and the levels they are at.  They need me to connect with their animal instincts and be their leader and they need my husband's silly child-like qualities to bring out the puppy in them.  It brings a balance and harmony you might not expect, but it works for us.

So how do you relate to your pets?