There goes Blaze

Blaze here with a short, short video of me pulling Mommy on the bike.   

Daddy was so excited he went crazy with the camera. 

I was just too fast for him.  Hehe

Look at me go!!

Monday Memories-Christmas morning 2006

In the spirit of Christmas here is Brut after unwrapping his presents on his first Christmas.

He was 10 weeks old. 

You can also see Princess Leia peaking out behind the tree.  She was 14 weeks old. 

I'm going to get you Mr. Teddy Bear!

A Little Mommy Time

Many days I feel like my days are well balanced between the two packs.  There are days when one pack may receive more attention than the other or days when certain dogs are singled out, but I still try to maintain a balance and meet everyone needs.  Then there are days like today when I feel like I have failed every single one of them. 

It is these low days when I find myself in mental exhaustion that I just don't have the energy to give them much and they suffer.  At least I think they do because it makes me suffer.  There is nothing worse than not being able to give the simple things that I believe dogs need.  A walk, playtime, training.  I just couldn't do it today and it was difficult day with that fact alone, not to mention all the other stresses that have brought me down.  It makes me feel like the worse dog mom in the world.  It's difficult maintaining two packs of dogs, there is a constant back and forth that can be maddening at times.  The constant division is just that, division.  It hurts that things must be that way for now and sometimes makes me wish there had been a way to see into the future of Chance and Blaze's return for I would have never let them go in the first place.  That along with a number of other things I wish I could have done differently in raising my dogs.  I would like to fix everything between the two packs to make them one right now.  Yes, I have many regrets, things I would love to do over and sometimes have a hard time accepting things as they are now, but I also know I can't change what I didn't know and what happened.  Although sometimes it would be nice to start over.

I do believe everything happens for reason and that things have a way of working themselves out.  I have found taking baby steps and making mistakes along the way have brought all of the dogs closer to being reunited with each other.  Sometimes when depression gets the best of me, it is hard to see the progress and the reasons why, but I do know they are there.  It these days that I want to just curl up with all of them and tell them how sorry I am for screwing up.

For more on the two packs you can read:  How We Became Two Packs

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The Differences of a few Genes

I love the comment that Houndstooth left about our last post, My Scooby Doobie Doo:

Houndstooth:  Isn't it funny how certain dogs just have the ability to do things that endear them to us, even though it would bug the daylights out of us if others did it? I love his happy go lucky smile and attitude!

Which got me thinking how true that statement is.  What I find cracks me up about my walk with Chance, turns into a nightmare with Blaze.  Blaze is so driven, when she pulls me on our walks it turns into aggravated frustration.  Blaze doesn't care whether she dragging me or not.  She wants to go where she wants to go.  I rarely find my walks with her to be amusing.  She is wickedly smart and is always devising what works to her advantage.

It doesn't help that I'm horrible at leash training and Blaze and Chance were never leashed trained before they came back to us.  Blaze uses this to her advantage.  Chance does too, but he is playful smart ass about it whereas Blaze is strong willed and has a one track mind.  It is difficult to find the humor with Blaze when we are always competing with each other.

Chance and Blaze

(brother and sister)

The same walk with two different dogs.  What is cute and funny with one, will irritate me with the other.  I can't imagine tolerating my other dogs pulling me down the street like Chance does, but then that's Chance. They each so unique with their own character, style and attitude that annoying as some things may be I wouldn't change one of them.  That is the beauty of their individual personalities and all the wonderful and not so wonderful qualities that make them who they are.    

My Scooby Doobie Doo

Are you ready Mom?  (wink, wink)

Ever have one of those days when you leash your dog for a walk and they burst out the door making you feel like a cartoon character bouncing behind them?  This is how Chance and I started our walk, with his bounding action that left me flailing behind him.  In between catching my breath I couldn't sustain my laughter at how I must look like Shaggy trying to keep up with my white Scooby Doo.

He always has this silly, sly grin that looks back at me and says, "You wanted to go for a walk, we are going for a walk. Chance style."  He keeps me reeling between the giggles and trying to keep up, until I've got to turn him around so he can take it down a notch and I can catch my breath.  I have no idea how our "walks" turned into pulling game, but I love the freedom of letting him take the wheel.

With his smooth gait in constant motion, we continually negotiate on the pace.  In tune and in love we stay in sync with each other as we seem to glide over the snow covered road.  The dusk sky softly glows overhead as the snowflakes swirl around us.  Chance throws me a smile that says, "You know you love it."  I nod back.   I love everything about our walks with my special Scooby Doo.   

     

UNBROKEN

Imagine a two month old puppy, locked in a room for hours, barking with all her might for someone to save her, only to be hit and told to shut up.  The door slams shut, footsteps walk away and she stands tall and barks again.  She will not be ignored.  She will not be broken. 

She is well aware, this is not love.  She knows because she had it once.  Where she was cared for and free to be herself.  She understands this more than he will ever know.  She knows what it is like to be acknowledged and respected, it is not here.  She demands what she can not be given.  She will not stop until she is heard.  Every blow makes her dig deeper into her soul and makes her fight harder.  She will not be broken.

She started this fight without any intentions of giving up.  He rubs her nose in it, kicks her, hits her, shoots her with a pellet gun, the battle has only begun.  Finally at long last, the call is made, he can't take her anymore.  She is going home.

Weary from her battle, her emotional wounds exposed.  Blaze curls in a tight ball, scared and in shock as the terrors of what happened to her unfold within her.  She is home, where she was born, but it has changed.  Gone are her brothers and sisters and the fun of being together.  She feels lost.  Mommy and Daddy tend to her emotional and physical scars, soaking her with their tears.  They understand.  They understand more than she will ever know.  Just a shell of herself, she fought so hard to be back here, she test them the only way she knows how.  She barks and barks.  Never a hand was laid on her and she proves their love is forever.
          

Blaze's story here

Sneak attack!

 While Mommy is busy with birthday candles (and believe us she's got enough) we decided to sneak in and take over the blog and show you what Mommy really does around here.  

This is Boxer.  Boxer is about to get a sneak attack.    

And we always get in trouble for teasing the cats!

Where does she think we learned it from?

Gotcha Mom!!

BOL

Monday Memories-The White Pack

Brut and  Silver had 3 mini-packs in their litter:  3 puppies in the Husky-looking pack, 3 black puppies with white on their chest and paws pack and...

 the 4 puppies that made up the white pack, all hanging on to Mommy at one day old.