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Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Male vs. Female

I grew up with the notion that female dogs were better than males. I'm not sure what I thought of that knowledge, but my flimsy teachings were challenged when I got my first male dog.  He was a surprise so he was picked out for me and was one of the best male dog relationships I had.  Then Alex came along and he took that male dog-female relationship to a new height.  Then we got Silver, who was my first female puppy where I learned a sisterly/motherly kind of love, giving me a greater appreciation of the female bond.  And since then we have had a male and female pairing with each "set" of dogs.

I find myself more times than not creating a deeper bond with the male dogs.  I find when I am in a funk of sorts, feeling less than myself, it is the self-confidence and pride of the males that I zero in on.  Their strength and self-assurance seems to transform what I am lacking at the moment as I pull from their resonating force.  They also seem to have more of a comical, teasing nature that can make me laugh even on the darkest days.  They have a way of pushing and testing me beyond my own limits and bringing out the competitive side of me.    For all their power and stealth, it is amazing to draw upon their softer sides for that strong male comfort that everything will be alright.  There is something powerful and endearing in these strengths that I have come to love in my male dogs and feel so blessed to have them in my life.  

Now the females have this same strength and confidence and are just as powerful as the male dogs, but they do not need to make their presence known, it is always there.  When it comes down to it though, they are the ones in control.   They have a quiet, yet strong grace about them that has shown me how to embrace female attributes.  There is a sense of equality when the girls are I are together where I find more empathy and understanding when I am feeling low.  They seem to "take on and absorb" my pain rather than try to revert it.   They are all nurturers and our "girl time" together is a bonding of our unique female qualities.  They are tender and sweet like girls should be, but they will not hesitate to exert their power when challenged.  I think this is one of things I love about them, while they are loving and adorable there is a vibrant force within them they use to hold their place.  They have no problem drawing that line and letting themselves be known.  

Each gender brings their own to the table.  This beautiful gift of having three of each that are all related, has been a fascinating journey, a study in the making.  From the simple to the complex differences of male and female dogs and their relationship to us as humans, male and female.  For example, while I tend to be drawn more to the males, my husband, surprise, surprise, is drawn towards the females.  And while neither gender means more than the other, it is interesting how many qualities are similar in each.  Experiencing the wide dynamics of both genders and their individual personalities has been a beautiful gift that has made helped me to appreciate both genders and the treasures they have to give.   

So how about you?  Do you have a preference when it comes to gender?  Why or why not?  Were you ever taught a preference about male/female and then discovered different?  How does gender differ in the way you have bonded to your dog?

    

15 comments:

Bailey Be Good! said...

Mommy says she's ALWAYS had females... dogs, birds, hamsters (not sure if they were female, but they had female names!), and a mouse. All except one Beta fish named Max.

She's never been taught to only like girls - it's just what she's always had, so that's what she's always gotten.

I say girls rule though. Heh. ;)

Woofs & hugs <3,

~Bailey (Yep, I'm a girl!)

♥♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥♥ said...

Very interesting analysis. Mom grew up in a family that seemed to have a preference for females - easier to train, less likely to wander. But she doesn't really think that is necessarily true - a lot depends on the individual dog.

Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, Ciara, and Lightning

Greyhounds CAN Sit said...

I've never had a preference for male or female but I've never had a breed where there is an obvious difference in males and females. And then there are mutts where you don't know what you're getting, like Frankie:) I do know with Greyhounds the females are usually more 'on to it', sassy and bossy than the males, who tend to be more easy going and laid back. Of course, there are exceptions in both sexes! If it were possible for me to add another Greyhound to our family now it wouldn't worry me what sex it is or colour. I'd probably try for something 'needy' or less likely to be snapped up. But I dearly love my sassy, bossy Beryl!

Sam said...

Growing up, my Mom only wanted females, so I grew up with everything being female. Big Ben, our rescued Dane, was our first male and he pretty much cemented my Mom's feelings about male dogs (he actually peed on the hood of our car!). Sam was the first male pup I had picked, and I have to say the bond between us is greater than any female dog I have had. I remember reading females are more independent and males are more friendly, and I would say that is true.

Sam

houndstooth said...

I like both for different reasons, but I find that I prefer the females. I can't say why exactly, I just love their feminine wiles! lol

Corbin said...

I prefer males... no reason really. When I was first thinking about getting a dog, I knew I wanted a male. And along came Corbin :o)
-Corbin's mom, Jenn

Kirsten said...

I really have no preference, tho now I am longing for a little girlie-spirit since my house has been male-dominated since my old lady Tashi passed away.

It does seem that more boys than girls end up on death row at the shelter at age 1-3...for my first year of steady fostering, I had one boy dog after another. When I foster again, I'm going to insist on a girl to balance out all this male energy--though the last time I did that, I ended up with a boy anyway!

Sugar the Golden Retriever said...

Woof! Woof! My mom had a female n male dog growing up. They were both different. She did not have any preference ... it just so happened I am female dog. Golden Thanks for sharing this post. Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar

FYI: I am co-hosting a weekly Tasty Tuesday, it starts today. Check out my blog post today. The Blog Hop Badge is also posted on my blog too that you can proudly display on your blog. Hope you can plan to join us in the future. Golden Woofs, Sugar

Kristine said...

I've never really considered gender differences between male and female dogs. Since my dogs have all been spayed/neutered I've never really considered them from that point of view. Shiva may be technically female but to me she is a dog without gender. So I really have no personal preference. I don't give her pink collars or treat her any differently than I would if she was male. I like to joke that I practice gender-neutral dog ownership. :-P

But others I have talked to on the subject do seem to notice differences. Personally, I think every dog is different, whatever the original sex. Just like people.

FiveSibesMom said...

Grown up with and had both...both devoted, both special bonds...although I will say that right now my two boys are so good...our one girl the alpha whom I adore, can have an attitude, guess that's why she's a great alpha! But my boys...gentle spirits to the max. But I'll take boys, girls, girls, boys!!!

jen said...

I have always had male dogs. I don't know what it is but I always have!
That may change in the future:)

retriever said...

I began with a femelles and continue always with femelles,long year ago i have malesinmy chilhood, love togother,

Pup Fan said...

You know, I grew up with the same thought that female dogs were somehow better. Not really sure why that's what my family thought!

www.highonanimals.blogspot.com said...

People say females are gentle and easier to handle. I can't comment because I have not had a female. But my two boys are just mischievous. If home space allows one more dog, I will make sure its a female. Perhaps she can make them less naughty.

Kirsten said...

Hey, you inspired me to do some further research on this important topic! http://peacefuldog.blogspot.com/2011/09/scientific-gender-study.html